There is this conflict inside of us now and then,between our mind and heart in expressing our desires,anger and sorrows….but thinking of the consequences,it’s finally the appropriate response that is being reflected and sometimes “appropriate responses” can be from our minds rather than deep down from heart.These responses may make us sad and even miserable(in my case) sometimes.Practicing the ‘ART OF PLEASING OTHERS’ does not happen overnight…..but trying to break them is much more harder and a tiring job.
As days go by,you sometimes forget why you started to wear the veil in the first place.People start to take your weakness for their strength and in an instant,you become their puppet.The very mask you put on for the welfare of others turns a nightmare for you.That’s where the real struggle begins…within you and yourself.The funny fact is that people,for whom you underwent this ‘unlikely transformation’ will be the first person to flee from your life.Now you may have a question…”THEN WHY THE HELL DID I DO SO MUCH FOR A BOLTING PERSON ?”…Well,you know how human tendency is!!Once you give a person a lot of importance,you lose your importance to that person.
From my earlier posts you’ll be certain that I’ve issues with my family.People say “FAMILY IS WHERE HEART IS!’…I too once believed in the idea of it.It was for my family that I started wearing my facade,to make them happy and content with me.There is this general idea that “one who does it for the sake of one’s own family is really selfless despite their struggles”. But,I can assure you that it is not an act of altruism…just means that you are a coward and you are not ready to face yourself (ie) your inner demons.
I’m not sure of all cases,but this my story.To me,wearing a veil doesn’t mean being artificial (or) fake…but to be sweet and caring towards my loved ones.I don’t know how people may interpret this…but this my truth.Now when priorities changed for people around me,they pushed me way down below.This really hurt me…like when I was ready to sacrifice ‘the real me’,they just replaced me…just like that.Thus, unable to react either way,I withheld myself for no reason.This also started to take a toll on my social circle and peers.I was being branded as ‘stubborn’,’Ms.with.attitude’ etc.
It was really tough and a tiresome job to break those facade away.But,breaking them only made the situation worse.My parents found the “real me” inappropriate and declared me for having depression.The final result of wearing a mask is that…I don’t know which is the real me anymore!!Well,this is what is I fetched in the end.
This song really made me realize and rethink my decision…that I’m the reason for my state.So,to all out there:either teenagers (or) adults…wearing a mask can get you only one outcome…”DESTROYING YOUR OWN TRUE SELF”. Please don’t avoid truth because when it reaches you again, it’ll be uglier than before.If you can’t be your SELF,then you’re NOBODY!!My ideas and beliefs may vary with others…these are just my experiences & confessions and can differ from people to people.So I’m sorry if I’ve hurt anybody.Last but not the least….
“JUST BE YOURSELF.LET PEOPLE SEE THE REAL,IMPERFECT,FLAWED,WEIRD,BEAUTIFUL AND THE MAGICAL PERSON THAT YOU ARE” ! 🙂
Episodes from my Existence 